Bike

Thanksgiving was so good.

Took a bike ride to work off the pie.

Thoughts;

fall

oranges

this fish I am nannying

water.

Today I am thankful for the shelter of family.

I came home and after everyone fell asleep, watched Water (2005) on Netflix.

I cried.

A lot.

Now I feel thoughtful.

This movie stirred something in me.

Thoughts;

flicker

waft

permeate

whisper

rage

knot

I am guilty of censoring myself.

Sometimes I am unable to say what I feel.

I do not permit myself.

Is that really so wise?

A thousand voices singing,

each note was the Truth.

I want to be kind.

I want to be gentle.

I want to be calming.

I want to soothe.

Drying of the Lawns

Took pictures with the lovely frend and her borther.

It's so nice to have her home!

Today I am really grateful for the people in my life and the Grace I have received.
I'm so happy I have the choice to be whoever I want to be.
I'm so blessed to have what I have and what I do not have.

Thoughts;

Josh, you happy?
July Flame
thesaurus/thesauri
flannel sheets
candles
Tuesday
pheasant feathers
photography
cuddles with Beckham

Reflections

Lately I have been thinking about death. Not in a morbid or depressing way, but in an enlightening and behavior altering way. There is one fact; we all are going to die. Everyone and everything I have ever loved is going die and come to an end. My family, my friends, my pets, my relationships, my electronics, my college education; nothing lasts forever. 

The fact that we know this, but don't think about it shows how much of a naturally optimistic species we are. But by acknowledging the fact that it will all come to an end, I think it releases us from the fear of loosing.

\

I've been looking deep into myself lately, and I'm realizing I don't allow myself to go too deep because I'm afraid of when it will end. It doesn't matter. It always ends. No matter what. If I allow myself to enjoy it 100% or only half-heartedly. I'm not protecting myself from anything. Just numbing myself unnecessarily.

I guess what I am saying is that now I catch myself.

I catch myself stressing out about Tuesday getting sick.

I catch myself stressing out about paying for college.

I catch myself stressing out about relationships.

Then I remind myself that the end is imminent.

Of course, add my faith to the equation and it makes more sense.

But more on that at a different time.

I have a gem show to get ready for...

Thoughts;

worship

Tuesday

"To Do" lists

cold toes

socks

fire

lies

life

my savings account my father is keeping for his new kids

anger

mercy

grace

unchanging love

forgiveness.

Mountain Man

Obsessed with Mountain Man and their beautiful harmonies.

Going to make a CD right now.

I've been working with Tuesday and have this to say:

It is not conventional, but it is what I can do. I can't buy a rodeo queen ready horse. I have what I have, and am learning so much. I am doing what I can and enjoying it.

Laugh, shake your head, raise your eyebrows; I don't care.

She's my horse and I like her.

It's my life and I like it.

It's my ponytail and I like it!

(If you get that reference you win $500)

Tboughts;

rain

lounging 

floral pillowcases

christmas lights

Chico State

Welcome, November!

We hiked Feather Falls.

Today, I am sore and sorry.

Sorry that I didn't work out more before the hike.

It was pretty but the best part was the smell.

The smell of the forest is the best.

Monday I saw Daughter and Choir of Young Believers in San Francisco.

Daughter was so unbelievably amazing.

Thank you, Tessa, for letting me know about the concert!

Igor looked like this guy I had a crush on in the 8th grade... :)

Ha! Mostly though, they played amazing.

Normally live doesn't sound better than the record, but man.

Seriously the best show I have been to.

Today is the Sikh Festival here in town, so I am about to drag my sore self out there and get my chai and samosa on.

Good week!

Thoughts;

pine

pine pine

pine pine pine

pine pine pine pine

pine