Sunday, October 30, 2011


I have to be up at 8am tomorrow.
I'm going to my Sociology class for the first time in a month, I hope I'm not dropped.
In some parallel universe, I am wreching in loss.
Thank God Friday ended differently.
Tomorrow; judging offices.
I made my own mask.
Tuesday; No Shave November starts.

I am Vice President.
Nerd, I know.

Saturday, October 29, 2011

Hug your mom

Yesterday there was a bomb threat at my mom's work.
Things got so heated she actually texted me 'goodbye'.
Needless to say, I started crying and praying fervently.
She came home safe, thank God!
But it was a scary reminder of mortality.
Really, we are all hanging on to life with such a slim thread.
Ugh, I can't imagine life without her.
I think what really terrified me is that God had been like, you should visit her, on my way home from school. I was like nahh I'll see her at home later. Then the whole 'Oh My God what if that was my last chance to see her' panic hit me. God, I am so glad she is here. I love her.
We're going for a bike ride. I love my mom.
You should hug yours.

Thoughts for the day;
Anouk has grown into a Lady Cat
No Shave November
write my lovely penpals back, soon
fall festivals
birds chirping
my camera ate 5 important pictures
new cell phone sometime

Yesterday I also found an exploded apple cider bottle in my freezer. (Frend forgot it. I cut myself a few times on tiny shards of glass. I found it that morning but had to get to my bio lecture. The part I cleaned was the majority, but my nana flew into a rage once she felt sticky, and wouldn't stop cleaning until she knew the sticky monster was defeated).
Then I spilled ALL of my favorite tea (Tazo Zen, which I am almost out of) on my already dying cell phone. Turns out Volvo cup holders aren't meant for coffee mugs. Do Europeans just sip their tea out of teacups in the morning? I'm going to have to go to Goodwill and find some fun, fitting teacups. At least my phone was warm when I went to text everyone it would be shorting out soon.
Reality, it did not short out. It has survived being smashed by my butt and a rock at Fort Bragg, being dropped numerous times, an entire hot cup of tea poured on it, my bottomless pit of a purse, babysitting (code for being gnawed on by bratty toddlers), and being lost in a truckbed.
Most impressive, my little Blitz.

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Nueva Musica

Aside from my family all teaming up to be ridiculously obnoxious at the same time, my day has been pleasant.

Today I;
spanked my Bio exam
found, not one, but three pennies from my penny fairy
got a sweet pick-me-up from Chels
^ seriously, amazing music blog ^

Tuesday, October 25, 2011


Today reminds me of this song, from freshman year of high school I think...

When did I become so numb?
I want to move.
I want to live by the ocean.
I want to be cold and washed by the moon.

I got a letter from my penpal in PA.
His CD enchanted my Tuesday night.
The mundane trip to Walmart for cat litter and conditioner was made magical.
I thought about the fact that there are lives separate from mine going on.
I know, that is obvious, but how amazing that Life is that big?


I love my boys.

Phillip LaRue
night walks
letters and pen pals

The sky is bruised, black and blue,
because I beat the stars for you.
You said they shined too bright;
made it hard for you to sleep at night.

Friday, October 21, 2011

November article submission.


From all sides, secular life is abrasive. Sometimes it feels as though your morality is being scrubbed down with one of those horrible wire brushes. Sometimes it feels more like you’re being pounded by a jack-hammer. People you love and respect pulling on you to make poor decisions, your favorite show taking a turn to the risqué, the beat to that new song is cool except for the raunchy lyrics but everyone is listening to it; sometimes it’s hard to be a sheep in a world of wolves.

Sometimes it’s OK to take time and cry out to God. This is nothing new. Thousands of years ago, when God’s chosen people were trying to make it to their promised land, they were a little nervous about how they were going to get there. And from a secular mindset, they had good reason. They were going to have to cross through borders of enemies and face big, mean, scary peoples who did all the things they weren’t supposed to do. God’s people were going to look stupid. They were going to be outsiders. They were going to smell different, eat different, look different. They worshipped a god who wasn’t on the Top 10. But God told them, ‘don’t be afraid of them, I’m bigger, stronger, faster. I’m fighting for you. Don’t give them a second thought. I’ll get you through this.’ (Deuteronomy 3:22).

Do you ever have moments where it feels impossible? I know that I feel discouraged when we have open discussions about faith in my philosophy class. The same information I hear and marvel at God’s big-ness, they suck Him right out of it. It is as if they can’t see the golden thread of Divinity that is woven through everything known and yet to be discovered. God let me kick this around for a few days before whispering Romans 8:7 to me. With that verse, I felt just a little piece of His heart. The mind governed by the flesh is hostile to God, not only does it not submit to Him, it just can’t. This realization is saddening. Once again we are reminded that there is a serious need for us to shine as bright and pure as we can through Christ. How can we do that if we’re blending in with the wolf pack? We need to be sheep-ish, in a biblical way. As the holidays approach, try your best to stay true to Grace. Check your materialism. How is your heart? Remember we are set apart, so we’re going to be different. How different are you?

I love my Volvo

My mom, looking with us (Granddad and I) under my wagon.
Granddad, pointing to the ominous dripping from my transmission.
She's a lady, though.

I love my Volvo.
No, actually.
I love her.
Today I cleaned her, and also was shown her "leaks".
She reminds me of the "unclean" ladies in the bible with their, uhm, issues.
I love her, regardless.
I painted her license plate frames.
"John 3:8", my favorite verse,
with a dandelion blown by the wind.

Rocky Horror Picture Show tonight; why are people telling me to bring toast?
Article deadline today...
Got a haircut!
Need a job.

I am a rose.

Tuesday, October 18, 2011


"If I can keep my claws and teeth,
I'll be able to see the other side," said the princess.
"Remember, proud lioness," said the mouse,
"you are but a pussycat."

Anouk; kitten nugget
TGIF; thank God for frend
formal lab write ups
The Ambassador looming deadline
movie night

I want some rain, please.

Sunday, October 9, 2011

the weekend of Flats.

You'd think I wore more jewlery than just my daily-worn locket.

She doesn't smile. But I love her.

I rode my bike to the Buttes Saturday, because I am anti-social and have nothing better to do.
That little voice in my head said, 'hey, you should go home... what if you got a flat out here?'
So naturally I did the mature thing, since I am an adult and a lady;
I shrugged it off and kept going.
WAAAAAAY out in the middle of nowhere, my rear tire dramatically gives up on life.
Only then do I think back to the nudge of a warning I was given.
Now what?
I go through the list of possible saviors.
My mom was working.
My grandparents were out of town.
My friends weren't picking up their phones or were out of town or didn't know how to find me.
Boy was working.
Sister didn't have the key to my car.
Sister's friends all are busy.
Luckily the Boy had a friend rescue me, and by 'friend' I mean hillbilly bumpkin driving a ridiculous truck.
sigh, thank you hillbilly bumpkin, thank you and your ridiculous truck.

I made them cookies, and set the smoke alarm off. I don't think they burned too bad though...

film pictures all weekend.
new camera though.

Poor bike.
I've been cursing a lot less like the pirate I was last month.
Relient K resurgence!
I'm hungry.
I love my new camera, can't wait to show it to my photo professor (a vintage slr; a Ricoh KR-5).
church was good, I love Pastor David.

Breathing in, breathing out;
I'm alive again.

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

call me Midas.

I love this cat.

I don't know where my golden creatures went after my birthday.
I don't know why it took almost two weeks to question their absence.
I think my mother has something to do with it...

class tomorrow
I love that I got to name my Bio mouse 'Ramses'
I think I will wear a dress tomorrow...
I should have bought that blouse at Thrifty's on Sunday. Merg.
My boyfriend is a mechanic,

Tuesday, October 4, 2011


I've been doing mainly film shooting.
I'm in love with it.
I'm going to be sad once my class ends, and my dark room access ends with it.

Boo, Forever
by Richard Brautigan

Spinning like a ghost
on the bottom of a
I'm haunted by all
the space that I
will live without

Steph got sick so I picked her up from school and she came to class with me so I could turn in my Philosophy essay. Poor baby girl.
I've cleaned the house, while she sleeps.
It's interesting how I'm gleaning home-skills from my mom and nana, and almost have the home-making touch.
I'm ready to move out I think.
But I don't want to do it alone.

Thoughts at the moment;
clean, clean, clean
Bio exam, merrr

Monday, October 3, 2011


old; self portrait

votary; dedicated to.

Essays = merggg.

this weather is nice,

bon fires
I think I'm in love...
I'm addicted to breathing and cursing like a sailor; one has to stop.
thrifting for tapes, records, sweaters, boots
running away from all school work, ever, forever.

"just cast your cares
and I'll be there."